Apa jadi jika dalam hidup ini punya butang ESC. boleh keluar dari masa ini dan pergi ke masa yang kita mahu. atau keluar dari tempat sekarang dan tinggal di masa yang kita mahu. 

few days before , i read a book. A really good book. Suggested by one of my friend. I addicted to this book.
because you can smell the positive vibes and aura from the writer.
the simplicity but meanigfull.

the writer taught me about not to put high expectation on mere people. but instead put your expectation to Allah ; the One who Capable in granting your Doas.

he taught me about how to nurture the friendship . to heal if there is wound. Friendship for the sake of Allah. 

really taught me that you can do something else beside Medicine. 

and there is words that uttered similar like my mom's did..

"Umi tahu kakak memang boleh buat Medicine'

i doubted that words seriously once. but I hope someday  that i will , with the berkah of my Umi's words . And together with my parents' doa.

and sometime i really needs my Umi's hugs and motivational words.

if Allah give me one ESC button, yeah i will go to the moment where I can be beside my Umi and hear her words. advices.

terkadang terasa diri sangat bodoh. merasakan tidak layak berada dalam dewan kuliah di antara semua pelajar yang lagi pandai.

Pabila tidak bisa mencari Vein for venepuncture terasa sangat seperti seorang Medical Student yang tak capable.

sangat terasa inginkan doa dari Umi Abah. agar kuat menahan peritnya belajar. untuk menjadi salah seorang Doctor For Ummah. and also doctor for diri sendiri.

sebab diri sendiri ini pun severely wounded and sometimes maybe need frozen fresh plasma untuk naikkan BP balik. and sedikit Adrenaline. ( okay medical exaggeration)
aku banyak berfikir dan bersendirian. sebab aku berasa dengan bersendirian, kita boleh bermuhasabah . 

kekurangan diri. hubungan kita dengan Manusia dan Allah.

adakah kuat tali kita dengan Allah.

Sorry to mereka yang kurang aku berinteraksi. sebab banyak Flaws yang aku cuba selami pada diri ini.

that's why i am thinking if this life gotta ESC button, so i will mend all the mistakes that i made.

i was once wanna pursue my study in something. thinking that i am capable on doing it.
but ya, keep telling myself Allah put me here in this dangerous full of Pahala path for 'something'

orang lain ada midnight's thoughts. but aku? After lunch thoughts maybe.
sorry Random giller.

rasa down? listen to this and the lyrics.


PENANG I'M IN LOVE ( part ii )

assalamualaikum and hallo peopleeee....

last post i've talked about the town georgetown.

i'm in love with the buildingssss, the people., the street food.

 then the evening after zohor prayer, me and Bahtina went to Batu Ferringhi(BF)

i sure you the journey to BF BY CAT bus was the longest in my life ever.
with the snake like road.
but we enjoyed the scenery of beach by the road.
those signature view .

really cool
on the bus actually we didn't know the exact place to stop the bus .
so i asked this sweet high school girl.
she stop the bus for us in front of our budget hotel.
surely the hotel is not really cool from the outside but reallly beautiful inside.
with the open rooftop where we enjoyed our breakfast in the next day.

we asked for 3 person room and the beds were super cool.
the picture below was our room.

together with a TV and little snack.
the tv full with blockbusters movie.

when we arrived there, Bahtina and yana can't help themselve from fall to sleep.

i can't sleep. cannot.
why we must sleep when our true intention there was to travel and sight seeing?

after take the bath ( the bathroom is super coooollll . simple but elegant, didn't get the time to snap the picture :( )
i strolled by the beach. looked what peoole were doing.
compare the prices of the waterspodt there.
my true intention was to try PARASAILING!
the price was around 50-60MYR PER PERSON.

feeling like meditation with the beach cap in the room...LOL

i cannot move on with the beauty of the interior design of the room.
i stayed at the roomies .. in cinema room.(150 per night) sharing with my two friends.

the view in the evening during the walk.

at night we just walked to the night market by the beach.
some said it is happening during night.

1/2 happening for me and that night was raining and the nasi lemak that we wanted to buy closed so early.:(
ended up eating burger...:3

on the next morning, after shower and all, done our prayer, we went to the beach again...
MAK AIII, soo many alcohol bottles everywhere.

we found one brother ni, offer us with parasaiiling which we found the rate is the lowest la from the others,
and the distance they offer also the longest which was 1km i guess.
only me and Bahtina ride the thing.
we ride it ALONE  okay!
no tandem...
we felt like our heart wanted to fall off when we were taken by the boat and up the sea like sooooooooo highhhh,,,
then came all those killer story about the parasailing.
i just can't stop say the prayers...>.<

after that thing, we packed our bag, and eat some breakfast that the hotel provided.
we met a handsome mat salleh guy..>.<
so tall weh. 
and we also met an Austria girl. travelling alone.
they stayed at the same hotel.

after check out, went to ESCAPE. but we went there after the GST implemented so the price was so gila high and we need to spend like 5 hour.
we were running out of time to catch the bus to go back home lagi.
we canceled the games..:(
feel bad but at least we had been there.. at  the gate..>.<

then we go back to the town and look for Jeruk at Chowrasta. the biggest jeruk stall.
also before depart back, we went to eat some ABC and mee udang..

feel bad that i don't have time to go to Tanjung Bungah... but there are still have next time..

so that's the wrap.
hope enjoy reading.:D


PENANG, I'M IN LOVE ( part 1)

assalamualaikum . 
breathe in ,,, breathe out....

i have been planning to go to penang a long time a go.
i don't know why i'm sooo interested in penang.

the buildings maybe.
and yea, after i went there, i am more in love with it.

the heritage, the people, the food, the public transport.
everything is good for me.:D

i went there from TBS and arrive at butterworth.
the butterworth bus station near to ferry station where you need the ferry to go to georgetown if you don't want to go there by car
it's so convenient.

 it is my first time stepping my feet there, so i asked a lot of Questions to people.

and Alhamdulillah. the people are so friendly. the aunties.

 the were when we really don't know the street , the aunt just hear a little of our conversation then she interrupted to show us the road.
without we asked .
we met other tourist who asked us to take her photo.
i lost my phone! and i found it back.(fiuhhhhh)
there were lots of memories there.
 once arrived at the jetty at gorgetown , we took rapid penang. CAT rapid penang is free. we arrived at 6 am. we decide to go to the mosque to perform solat.

we went to Masjid Kapitan Keling. 
the signature Mosque there.
we ate Nasi Kandar beside the mosque.
ok la. just tinggal the leftover   of last night. 
we waited till sun rise then we just walk around the Masjid. 
the Masjid can be the landmark if you want to search for mural paintings. 

the murals located far from each other, to walk to each of them is really not a wise idea.
so as we walked , we saw a shop that rent the bicycle. so we rented it.

we kindda lucky because we nee to pay rm8 from 8am to 3pm.
the other shop is like kindda higher in price.
the shop taker will give you the map where the mural located.

just follow the map..:)

it is a new way of travelling weh.
by bicycle in a town where the bus is so vigorously on road? 
why not.:)

one thing that i don't really like is the honking of cars and busses.

 those 'mata sembap' on the ferry and the joy of having nasi kandar pagi-pagi buta...>.<
 the ancient looking street . the heritage seriously we need to make it last..

 my partner in crime ; Bahtina.
like seriously we did a crazy thing. just the day we did the vacay, couple of days after that will be the exam.
the bicycle we took, so cute with the basket in front. the shopper also gave advices to us about the thieves, so she secured our bag with the key.

 the camera museum i suggested to those who really love to know the history of cameras, rm 10 per person.

 by walking or bicycle is the only wise transport for you to hunt the mural paintings.
i really cut down the money on food ;  we eat only the rojak and cendol.
the best cendol and rojak ever!
no doubt.
i'm not a cendol lover but when i tasted it, the coldness of the cendol melts my heart.

we only eat a proper food when we reach Batu Ferringhi.
later with the Batu Ferringhi because there is a lot awesomeness for watersport lovers.

till then , byenye...




"Orang yang berjaya bukanlah tidak pernah gagal,tetapi mereka bangkit selepas gagal..

few week hectic with exams!!!! 
 if dulu dulu takdelah rasa being a student ni macam susah, but, beberapa hari before exam hari tu,
macam nak call abah and suruh dia kahwinkan je aku denngan sesape,. malas jadi student, jadi housewife je


but then, 

Nasihat Imam Syafi'i, "Jika kamu tidak kuat menanggung lelahnya belajar, maka kamu akan merasakan perihnya kebodohan"

i learnt couple of things from my roomate.
basicaly it happened when i'm soo downnnn like omg-i'm-not-yet-getting-ready-for-exam!!!!

few from her words are.

- do good deed to Allah's creatures, all of them. birds, cats and trees. they might be praying for you due to your good deed.

- worry less, because Allah has set a path for human. 

i really feel the words are really meant to me as i really keep worrying something that even i can't change it. for example exam result la.

this sem will be the most hectic exam all of my life....  i failed many subjects.
man. i just feel okay because yea,it's not the only me who got the same result. 
but then, worrying about how future will come to me, tears keep coming down for that.

feeling stupid because try to take care of Allah's work.

i did my best. and we leave it to Allah. even there are subject that i don't have time to cover. i know Allah will give the best for. if the result will turn out not nicely, i pray to Allah for strength to endure it.
this is life.

it's not going as you plan but it's going as Allah's plan.

plan the best. expect less , hurt less. keep praying.

i think i didn;t really make it. so i think i need to put all of my books in the luggage i guess..;)
but don't forget to tawakal and doa.:D

arwah yasmin ahmad gave  a very nice quotes. -work hard,doa,do best to your parents. that's the key to success.:)


Feeling rejected

The moment I’m writing , yea, quite feeling rejected
I had felt the same feeling before and today I feel more I can handle this kind of feeling.
instead of planting yourself in other people it is better to plant yourself to The Creator.
So even though many people forget me even though due to my mistakes or theirs, you won’t feel anything because maybe I have immune to it.
There’s a lot more person that I need to care of,

Maybe I need to give them space
Maybe I’m too clingy
Lots of maybe.

And at the end of the day, I just stay who I am and be obedient to the Creator. That’s it.
The key to calmness.
Just like the early time when I enter UKM, I feel alone.
Yea, despite having so much people around me at that time.

Time to be more matured.
Not to be touching because small matter
Stay calm even though you’re alone
Sooner or later you will be a loner too.
Alone when eating. Alone when studying.
Alone when walking..

maybe next time next to be more 'qawiy' in handling self problems...:D



Assalamualikum. fiuhhhh...
it is a very lonnnnnggggggggggggggg time not writing .

acquired a something that is really heavy like 'amanah' makes people to expect more from us.
seriously talking.
i just exhausted getting people's high expectations.
seniors', parents' and friends'
 their expectations to me just like how they want me to be.
but some people know my limitations, but there are some people that expect me to be someone who really got the power.

like once you got a 'pangkat' doesn't mean you change from 100% human  to 100% angels..
you still the human who has flaw and sinful.

i can do my best for myself.
lately, i learnt that ' do not do something for the totally the sake of another person'
because you end up getting bored with what you are doing.
just be with what and who you enjoy.

like medicine, it is very interesting..:)
can i be the doctor for ummah?
the doctor that serve for her patients?
in shaa allah..:)
hope so.

like studying medicine also, that's not all about getting A's and happy and getting married afterward.
you fail, you get up and getting fail again ,getting scolded .. that's life.

just face it..

you got one chance to live.
so live the way you want to be...

at the end of the day, if i make mistakes, please forgive me.
i'm a human anyway.
i make flawssss... LOTS

my friends, please together guide to the straight path...:D

P/S: video matlutfhi arrive just at time.